McCain Will Pay Your Mortgage

I have to thank my friend Reggie in Southern California for sending me this. You'd think with all the financial disasters of the past week, I'd be blogging twice a day. But maybe there were too many disasters! Has all the doom and gloom affected you? Has it caused you to hold back on spending? I really want to know.

Meanwhile, do not worry. You now have the opportunity to work for Senator McCain in Yuma, which is in Southwestern Arizona, quite near California and Mexico. The work is not hard, though it requires bending, and may include long hours. But the sky is so beautiful (always) in Yuma, and the cost of living is very low. In fact, you can buy a home there for about $120,000, roughly half of the United States median priced home, and yet income is about the same as in the rest of the country.

Except yours! Listen to what John McCain wants to pay you to do…and let me tell you, the money is excellent! It's far more than I make now, and I'm looking for the sign-up sheet.

 

 

 

So there you have it, folks. And this man knows his money! In August, 2008, at a candidates' forum, the good senator was asked to define the dollar amount that separates middle class from rich. His number? $5,000,000. 

Unfortunately, I am no longer upper-middle-class (a large percentage of middle class folks like to consider ourselves "upper" middle class, even though our numbers don't back that up). I'm probably not even middle class. In fact, I'm so far below that number, I probably have no class at all.

Which is why I'm willing to pick lettuce. And when that's done, I'll stay on for cabbage and broccoli. I figure working 10 hour days, pulling in $500 a day, six days a week, I could pay off all my debts during a long growing season. Another couple years and my home would be paid off completely.

But can you imagine what we'd pay for a head of lettuce?